Tuesday, February 14

Hussein: "I'm Going Hungry"

BAGHDAD (SNARKY) -- I'm joining Saddam's hunger strike, too. Not as a show of solidarity to the deposed Iraqi dictator, but because I could stand to lose the few extra pounds that I amassed this winter. Come summertime, I hope to be svelte and lithe again so I can freely partake in activities at the beach. Meanwhile, Saddam probably just hopes for his freedom.

Saddam Hussein and I have a lot in common, incidentally. He grew a shaggy beard to evade his pursuers, while I grew a beard to advertise. He loves Mars bars, while I have a similar weakness for chocolate. And, he ruled 25 million under his tyranny; well, I've got this blog, damnit.

And we both do killer Chris Cornell impersonations.

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