Lukateake Spotted on Route 66, Film at 11

CHICAGO (SNARKY) -- Sorry Lukateake fans (all two of you), I took a long weekend off from the blog to re-energize. What, huh? ... I was gone for more than a trimester?! Hmmm, it didn't seem that long. Really, it didn't.

Nevertheless, it's good to be back among the livingposting, unlike that flash-in-the-pan CraftyAndSnarky blog. Truth be told, there was no way that a meglomaniac like me could get behind a project where I was getting second billing ... and buried behind an article of speech, too!

Well, since there's been a long layoff how about 10 updates about me since we last caught up with one another.

1. I was acquitted.
   
2. Tom Brokaw hopped on the now-fashionable global warming bandwagon driven by yours truly.
   
3. My Axe Body Wash has yet to run out. Though I take a shower everyday, I'm really more of a shampoo-as-soap guy, especially since I wear a hairshirt ... in the literal sense.
   
4. I still have no surrond system but the plasma TV exists, if only in my mind.
   
5. I killed Ken Lay.
   
6. I, The Ruckus, killed Paul Gleason.
   
7. I've started taking fashion tips from my soothing meditation instructor Matthew Lesko.
   
8. Tom Skilling is balder than ever but he's still weaseling his way into my life like a ... a ... wait for it ... a weasel.
   
9. Oil prices are up nearly 20 percent since I was last bored with the subject, four months ago.
   
10. Cheeseburger, it turns out, is quite happy with his decision.
    
11. The married guys are winning. And, after an extensive and expensive campaign, I'm the Best Man.
    

Yes, I know there are 11 entries above when I said that there would only be 10. Consider it a bonus, you inconsiderate bastard. And, frankly, I didn't think you'd read a list that contained 11 items so I had to dupe you.

And, no, this really shouldn't count as a new post; it's really more like a clip showblog. (Yes, I just learned the HTML tag that does strikethrough text. The really funny thing is that it took me these three months.)

Anyway, I'm back and I hope that you're back with me. I'll try to be funny, I'll try to be creative, I'll try to be entertaining, but know this: I will be me and I will be here. (Or here.) ((Or here.)) New and improved Lukateake ... now with 50 percent more elipses!

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